How's that for a t-shirt title, huh... almost embarrassing (if it wasn't totally awesome!)... have I got a story for you my little friends!
Y'know, I was a Bull once. A big, ferocious bull that could gore any man that dared come near me. I battled the bravest matadors in Spain, trampled their backs with my cloven hooves, swept sand in their eyes with my bullwhip tail. I was so rough and tough, hollywood producers were gonna clone Lee Marvin, Charles Bronson and Steve McQueen just to create a lovechild that could possibly do me justice in the movie of my life.
I didn't take no crap... I gored for a living!
But one day things got ugly, or should we say pretty, once I met Delilah... that sweet cow captivated me with her big brown eyes and soft-as-butterfly lashes. For God's sake, she cooed when she mooed! Her plump udders were such a delectable pink... er, let's just say I was hooked harder than a raging bull on a bright red spanish cape!
The bull who took no crap was suddenly king of the crap-takers... from a calf hoof!
It wasn't long before I was down on two knees proposing marriage... and she accepted! ol